The Internet browser... is the piece of software that puts a message on your computer screen informing you that the Internet is currently busy and you should try again later.
More Quotes from Dave Barry:
We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety of topics; this is how we stay objective.Dave Barry
The taxpayers cannot be relied upon to support performing arts such as opera. As a taxpayer, I am forced to admit that I would rather undergo a vasectomy via Weed Whacker than attend an opera.
Dave Barry
For many years the National Pretend Speed Limit was fifty-five miles per hour (metric equivalent 378 kilograms per hectare.)
Dave Barry
The nuclear generator of brain sludge is television.
Dave Barry
Mother Nature clearly intended for us to get our food from the patty group, which includes hamburgers, fish sticks, and McNuggets- foods that have had all of their organs safely removed.
Dave Barry
There are two distinctive classes of people today, those who have personal computers, and those who have several thousand extra dollars apiece.
Dave Barry
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Based on Topics: Internet QuotesI used to go around looking as frumpy as possible because it was inconceivable you could be attractive as well as be smart. It wasn't until I started being myself, the way I like to turn out to meet people that I started to get any work.
Catherine Zeta-Jones
You want to fall in love with a shoe, go ahead. A shoe can't love you back, but, on the other hand, a shoe can't hurt you too deeply either. And there are so many nice-looking shoes.
Allan Sherman
It is a curious phenomena that God has made the hearts of the poor, rich and those of the rich, poor.
Vinoba Bhave